Cracks

We have been here for 5 months now, and I count myself blessed to have a genuine love for the joy and beauty of the people here, strong relationships which have developed mainly through playing sports and language learning, and enough grasp of the language to at least get by in life.

This last month has been difficult for us at many points, however. Water and electricity are still very inconsistent, we’ve been taking turns being sick, and we had a little scare with fraudulent activity on our bank account at home. Moreover, there are times when it is incredibly hard to live in a place where no one to talk to who can understand your language well, or who understands the culture that you come from, etc.

It seems that the strain that we have been under has been an opportunity for the enemy to inject doubt into the cracks as well, that we won’t learn the language well, that we will be ineffective, or that maybe we missed His will completely and are here on a wild goose chase. And the worst of all is when God feels so far away…

This past week, all of these strains (and more) piled up and I came to a place where I felt so incredibly homesick and alone.

It is times like these that I believe God made mothers, best friends, and the Psalms for.

DSCN0218

So, I opened my bible to Psalm 91, and I read the first verse:

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High

will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.

After my initial irritation with the psalmist’s inability to state things plainly, I realized that there is truth that I needed to hear in the verse.

*When we seek God to provide us shelter from the storms of life, we will be near to God (whether or not we feel like it). Moreover, he is a big God who casts a shadow over us and any problems we have.

The end of the Psalm goes like this:

“Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;

I will protect him, because he knows my name.

When he calls to me, I will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble;

I will rescue him and honor him.

With long life I will satisfy him

and show him my salvation.”

This may seem like a simple revelation, but in the midst of pain and loneliness, it felt like the Lord was speaking to me, and I knew that he was close to me as I sought him to find peace. In the midst of a situation where there is nothing familiar, and where I feel like no one understands, he is more than enough… and it makes all of the difference.

DSCN0219

** We want to specially thank those who have been in prayer for us. You make an immense difference, and we are incredibly grateful for you!

Please continue to pray regarding health concerns as even small things can sideline both of us and hamstring our efforts to learn language and stay in community.